Reasons to be Thankful you Burnt the Bird!
- Salmonella won’t be a concern.
- Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened.
- Uninvited guests will think twice next year.
- Your cheese broccoli lima bean casserole will gain newfound appreciation.
- Pets won’t bother to pester you for scraps.
- No one will overeat.
- The smoke alarm was due for a test.
- Carving the bird will provide a good cardiovascular workout.
- You’ll get to the desserts even quicker.
- After dinner, the guys can take the bird to the yard and play football.
- The less turkey Uncle You-Know-Who eats, the less likely he will be to walk around with his pants unbuttoned.
- You won’t have to face three weeks of turkey sandwiches.
More Ways to be Thankful
(A Turkey's Lament)